Why Me?

We often ask "Why me?"  I know for me, it's normally in instances like, I just missed the bus, and the next one's not for another 16 minutes.  I ask, "Grr, why ME?  Why did I have to miss that bus?" 

Or, when I lived in America, and I'd be speeding, but everyone was speeding. Then the cop would pull me over.  "Ah, why'd he pick me when everyone else was going just as fast??  (or even faster, it seemed)" 

Why did the tickets sell out just before I got to the ticket window? 

You can fill in the blanks with your own particular situation, but we ask "Why ME?" in many different forms, but it seems to happen often.  (My most recent, why did I have to get this crazy landlord lady?)

Well, I think in all of those situations, there is something we're meant to learn... but I'm not going there right now.

Tonight, I was sitting in my apartment in Paris thinking "Why me?"  But these "why me" questions were slightly different, here's a peak:
  * Why did I spend my life DREAMING of living in Paris and now I DO!!!
  * Why did my mom take that invitation to go on a trip to Europe when I was 17 out of the trash and make me go?  (And from there, my determination to be in Europe took on a whole new meaning.)
  * Why do I have such amazing friends that can ask the hard questions and give me the hard answers to mine?
  * Why do I get to speak this amazing language with people in this beautiful country?  Why did I get to learn it when others struggle so much with learning French?  Of course, I still have quite a ways to go, but I can see such benefits from living with a French girl my first year here who "didn't speak any Engish at all."
  * Why do I have this amazing job where I walk into the office of some of the more powerful business men in Paris and I become the authority because I'm there to teach them English.
  * Why did I have this amazing fortune to be born in America and learn English as a first language, and not have to struggle with it like my friends and students do over here!
  * Why have I never gone hungry a day in my life?
  * Why have I never spent a night in the street?

WHY ME?

So, now and for the future, when I start to think "Why me,"  I want to turn my focus around on myself and realize the amazing blessings that I have in my life.  There's no more reason for it to be me who's never gone hungry than it is to be me who's just missed the bus.  And when I put those two things next to each other, I see that the blessings FAR outweigh the lack!  I don't know the answer to "Why me" in most of these situations.  But now, I am going to choose to see the blessings! 

Why Start Tying?

Why have I started this blog, you ask?  Well, I guess I've been inspired.  I have recently learned how to knit and I love it.  I love that you can start and stop and pick up where you left off.  I love that you can learn one simple stitch, or knot and make something beautiful with it.  I love that you take a different color or type of yarn and that changes the end product.  You can use a different set of needles and that changes the end product.  You can tie the knots tighter or looser and that changes the end product.  Everything you do along the way affects the product.  And isn't that what life is all about?  It's not about jumping to the end, but it's the process, it's the journey.  I was thinking about knitting and how it starts out as making knots, but really, it's not just knots.  It's so much more.  Thought goes into any piece I knit.  I think about what I want to make.  I know who I'm making it for before I start.  That influences the type of yarn and color I choose, and the needle size I choose.  With some friends, we knitted a bunch of scarves for some women who are getting out of very tragic situations.  We wanted to really place value on them.  I know that as I was knitting for them, I was thinking about the woman who was going to receive the scarf I was knitting.  I was praying for her and hoping that the scarf would please her and keep her warm; that she would feel pretty with it on and understand that she has value.  I realized that this scarf might be the first thing that she had received that was really made just FOR HER in a really long time, maybe ever.  I was so honored to have the opportunity and ability to knit that scarf for her.  I did my best knowing that I wanted to bless her and honor her with my best work.

In making those scarves for those women, I realized that knitting a scarf can be so much more than just tying knots.  A knot by itself is nothing of great beauty.  It's not something that can keep a person warm.  It won't be something they will wear every day.  But a whole bunch of knots put together can be a beautiful and practical garment.  Whether scarves, bonnets, mittens, blankets, sweaters, whatever the project, knitting is so much more than just tying knots. 

I realized that this theme of "not just knots" applies to every facet of life.  A dinner is so much more than just a meal when it's time spent with friends, building relationships, encouraging one another, influencing lives, and making a difference.  A smile can be so much more than just a smile when the person receiving it just really needs it.  You get the point, we can apply this theme to everything in life.  So, for this blog, I don't plan on just writing about knitting or any one other thing.  I'm pretty random, so my posts will likely be random.  I'd love for you to join me on this random journey!

I could say that my life is something like a grand knitting project.  It's about the journey.  It's about the knots I tie every day.  I don't see the big picture, but I know the One who does.  I don't know why sometimes a "row" is so much more difficult than another.  But, I know the One who will get me through to the next day.  I know that when I "drop a stitch" He is there with amazing grace to cover over my mistakes.  He will always make something beautiful out of this project as long as I continue to surrender to Him.

I think that in our lives, we have much more effect on others than we think we do, whether good or bad.  I'd like my effects to be good, but I know I sometimes fail at that.  What I can do is simply try to remember that it is not just knots, but there is something more, bigger, and beautiful that can result from all this.

So for now, I'll just keep... Tying Away =;-)